I still remember the time when, in order to look at a review or yourself, you had to go down to the corner store, buy a newspaper, and scan through until you found the few words to describe your performance (okay, I've mostly been an opera singer in the internet age, but I got reviews when I sang Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz with the Santa Rosa Community Players when I was 11, so bear with me). Now, with a few clicks of the mouse, you discover that people all around the world are talking about you, and some people, who are obviously more technologically savvy than yours truly, are even posting recordings of your singing!
I got back from Europe yesterday, and since I'm still on Europe time, I'm awake before absolutely ANYONE in new york city. It's 5 AM, still dark, and the bagel shop on the corner isn't even open yet. So, until this side of the world wakes up, I'm checking my emails and goofing off online. I saw that I had an email from a friend who said he'd found a recording of me singing my aria on the internet. WHAT? The first performance of Agrippina was indeed broadcast on the radio, and people certainly could have recorded it, but I was amazed (and humbled) that somebody posted my aria specifically on their blog. And since the blog is in spanish, I feel especially connected to my spanish roots (everyone always asks me how I got the name Rivera with all my blonde hair and blue eyes, and it's because my great grandfather was from Spain). Here is the link to the post with the recording of my final aria, recorded on opening night.
I had already heard the recording from the radio, thanks to another technologically savvy and generous reader of this blog, and I had one of those moments where, the first time I heard it, I thought. "WHOA - that was the tempo? That was FAST!!" It did not feel so fast to me at the moment I was singing it, but hearing it from the outside made me feel like I should have been wearing a helmet or something. I had also wondered what the B section sounded like, since I was lying on my side, sort of curled into a ball while singing it, and I was happy to discover that I couldn't really hear a change in the vocal production from that position.
I have to admit, typing my name into google and hitting search makes me very nervous. Should I read every blog entry that mentions my name or just stick to the news publications? Should I read the comments?? I wish I didn't have the personality where I am dying for everyone to like and approve of me, because that would make reading all this stuff much easier. Sometimes I just let my mom sift through it and protect me from the mean stuff, but then she has to see it, and I don't know if it's easier to read something bad about yourself or to read something bad about your only kid.
But even with this daunting plethora of information, I wouldn't change anything about the way we now are able to share information with one click, because it allows me this opportunity to connect with everyone who is reading these words, which has turned out to be a huge pleasure and comfort to me as I'm leading this nomadic and slightly insane life. AND it allows my friends in China to hear me singing in Germany. And come on, how cool is that?